Performance conversations are some of the hardest and most dreaded tasks managers have to undertake. They’re stress-inducing and exhausting, especially when emotions like frustration, guilt or even misplaced optimism overwhelm us and cloud our judgement.

But performance conversations, and the difficult decisions that sometimes follow, are also inevitable in leadership roles. That’s why it’s so important to prepare as best you can to facilitate those discussions as smoothly as you can.

While it may also seem obvious to point out that the goal is to drive these conversations and make follow-up decisions based on facts more so than emotions, that is all too often much more easily said than done.

Below, I outline how to make objective performance decisions, and in doing so, how to foster more resilient teams.

Why do emotions so often get in the way?

According to McKinsey research, almost 75 percent of organizational issues are relational, as opposed to technical.

People's problems are everywhere. After all, we’re only human, and our emotions naturally influence how we interact with and evaluate people at work. (It would be foolish to ignore the emotions we feel each and every day!)

It’s because of this that emotional intelligence is often valued as a crucial quality of strong leaders. But when team leaders feel paralyzed by diverse personality conflicts and catch themselves delaying and avoiding challenging conversations, the impact of this choice can ripple out across an entire organization.

So, how can we balance this tightrope walk that is leadership?

1. Leave your assumptions at the door

Even the most astute leaders are bound to make the wrong assumptions on occasion. So I always advise, first and foremost, to separate everything you’ve seen from what you think to be true.

Focus on specific behaviours that can be described and discussed objectively, and also look for patterns. Those one-off instances are usually situational, but if severe enough, can be handled the same way.

The point is, the more concrete and objective your examples, the more productive the conversation will be.

2. Look beyond outcomes

Results matter, sure. But, results don’t always tell the whole story.

When you find yourself in a situation where a project went awry or a task went unfinished, I recommend zooming out for a moment to consider effort, consistency, collaboration, and importantly, an employee’s overall approach to their work. A poor result usually stems from several factors, many of which may be out of the employee’s control.

Strong performance is about what gets done and how it gets done. Taking a holistic view of all the inputs like this can help leaders understand what has driven poor outcomes, as well as help facilitate tailored solutions.

This method can also empower your team to understand their contributions to and effects on outcomes, and in turn feel more engaged in their work.

3. Evaluate coachability and willingness to improve

Even a star employee can make a mistake or have a tough time that impacts their performance. (In the spirit of the 2026 FIFA World Cup, does anyone remember when Lionel Messi stepped on Algeria defender Aïssa Mandi's calf and nearly got red carded?!)

As a leader evaluating performance and professional development among direct reports, identifying qualities like curiosity, ownership and follow-through after coaching conversations will help immensely when the time comes to make decisions about an employee’s future.

One of the best indicators of future success is how someone responds to feedback.

In the long term, growth potential matters as much as performance does, and it’s performance conversations and resulting decisions that have direct impacts on retention, team resilience and culture, as well as organizational success.

Being able to discern how an employee can bounce back from difficulties will go a long way toward making those hard decisions.

A simple framework for making better performance decisions

Before we get into frameworks, I want to note that no framework will remove the human side of leadership. And nor should it.

Difficult conversations will always involve empathy, nuance and careful judgement.

What a framework can do, however, is create enough structure to stop emotions from becoming the primary driver of your decisions. It gives you a repeatable way to pause, assess the situation objectively and ensure you’re evaluating performance fairly and consistently, regardless of the individual or circumstances.

So, with that in mind, here’s are a few pointers that’ll help you make smarter performance decisions:

Gather the facts before drawing conclusions (even if your assumptions are proven correct in the end).
Evaluate behaviours, outcomes, coachability and team impact together.
Ask yourself whether you’ve provided the clarity, support and feedback needed for success before making a final decision.

Fair decisions build stronger teams

Decision making is an inevitable aspect of leadership, and good decisions can’t be made if they’re shied away from or completely clouded by assumptions and emotions.

Developing clarity and remaining equitable in your decision making over time will help you to approach workplace challenges with less dread and more confidence. When your team observes and gains trust that even the toughest decisions have been made fairly, morale and engagement will inevitably grow (alongside your own credibility as a leader).

To learn more about how Reframed Coaching is helping leaders make more objective and effective performance decisions at work, explore our New Manager Training or our Workplace Conflict Coaching & Mediation services.

Frequently asked questions

These frequently asked questions explore practical ways leaders can evaluate performance fairly, navigate difficult conversations with confidence and build stronger, more resilient teams.

Focus on observable behaviours, measurable outcomes, patterns over time and documented feedback rather than assumptions or emotions.
Leadership is inherently relational, so emotions like frustration, guilt or optimism can influence judgement if they aren’t balanced with objective evidence.
Consider behaviours, effort, collaboration, consistency, coachability and the employee’s overall impact on the team.
An employee’s willingness to accept feedback, learn and improve is often one of the strongest indicators of long-term success.
Gather the facts, clarify expectations, review the support you’ve provided and approach the conversation with consistency, empathy and curiosity.

How to Make Performance Decisions Without Letting Emotion Drive